by Jake Lorenzo
Wine Business Monthly has decided its readers no longer need the insights provided by an aging winemaker/detective. They clearly gave little thought to the financial needs of that same aging writer, but that is the way of the world. It’s been two months since this detective has written anything, but the time has come to say something.
So, Jake Lorenzo sits at the keyboard gazing through the window at our glorious backyard garden, which after weeks of backbreaking work is 90 percent cleared of winter weeds. Hummingbirds flit about the bright red/yellow bulb flowers that dangle like Christmas ornaments on the maple bush. The Green Goddess lilies are in full bloom, orange poppies glow in the sunlight and purple lilies have started their ascension. Spring is upon us. Life goes on.
Today is St. Patrick’s Day and I spent the morning making a SO2 addition as I racked three carboys of Pinot Noir Nouveau. I topped my barrels of 2025 Pinot Noir and Syrah, and I transferred a couple cases of Guerrilla Vino Pinot Noir from the winery to my house cellar. I went to the garden, harvested both lettuce and arugula, washed and cleaned them, and put them into the refrigerator. I walked down to Ye Olde Public House and had a solitary Guiness enjoying the idle conversation of unfamiliar bar mates and bartenders. Life goes on.
It’s not like this detective has been idle during this period of gainful unemployment. The days of madness that encompassed Christmas and New Years were loaded with friends, fine meals, and good times. We had eight for our traditional Christmas dinner of Prime Rib with Yorkshire pudding, spread out company through the week and celebrated New Year’s Eve with 14 in attendance for our traditional Dungeness Crab Feed (cooked like Cajun Crawfish.)
Daily weeding in January was broken up with chores. I had to put a new roof on the shed because it leaked when it rained. That revealed some rot, so a couple of beams got replaced along with two side panels. I pressure-washed the whole shed, primed it and then repainted it. It’s looking great for the upcoming summer.
By then it was time for Jake Lorenzo’s birthday, so we escaped the Northern California rains for two weeks of sunshine with friends in their Cabo San Lucas home overlooking the Pacific Ocean. We watched whales frolic in the Pacific, leaping from the water to splash back into the ocean again and again. Fleets of tourist-filled boats chased them until the whales grew weary and dove deep to be left alone. We weren’t as close, but still had a magnificent view, leaning on the edge of the pool with palomas in hand.
Each night, we’d wander down to town for a great meal, visiting old favorites like Farol 16, JM Steakhouse, or Invita Bistro. We did our mandatory crawl to Vas Que Vuelas for tlayudas followed by Tacos Ramiros and his incredible suadero. We were thrilled to find Mesa de Luna, a brand new favorite to add to our regular rotation. Guacamole y Pork Belly Chicharron, Aguachile de Costillas, Roasted Beet Carpaccio, and incredible Grilled Octopus all served with homemade tortillas, bread, and desserts. Some things don’t change and two weeks in Mexico is always good for the soul, even when the government unleashes its soldiers on the cartels inciting a round of setting vehicles on fire to disrupt traffic patterns.
We spent late nights deep in discussions, and since our hosts and the other guests were in the wine business we often pondered the downturn in the wine business. We made it a rule to never talk about the wine business while drinking wine, So Jake Lorenzo offered his theories while imbibing mezcal or tequila. Jakelyn’s mom stuck to a bottle of McCallan 12 Scotch, which she timed out perfectly to finish on our last night.
Typical causes for wines decline came up in our conversations. Wine was too expensive as were the tasting fees. Boomers were drinking up their cellars instead of replenishing them. Young people weren’t drinking. Tariffs were increasing costs. There were too many vineyards, grapes, and wineries. All good plausible causes for wine’s downturn, but this detective inserted something else. The population is too concerned with its health.
Granted, this is not original to Jake Lorenzo. I got most of my information from Dr. Iggy Calamari, inventor of the wine powered pacemaker. Dr. Calamari cited studies that show being fit is today’s biggest status symbol. One third of Americans said they’d like to live forever. They get real time health tracking from wearables that can run blood results on Chat GPT. Consumers are focused on their health, and they are being told that wine is unhealthy.
It’s not enough for people to feel good, they want to look good too. These days looking good is being skinny. One out of every eight adults, 15.5 million people in the United States, are using or have used GLP-1 medications like Ozempic or Wegovy to help control their weight. Dr. Calamari warns that GLP-1 medications target all pleasure centers in the brain. They don’t just reduce your desire to eat, they can reduce your desire to gamble, go out to events, or drink. If you are using GLP-1s, then you are likely drinking less than before. The desire to drink occurs less often and when you drink you drink less.
Whatever you think of President Trump, his policies have had a devastating effect on tourism in the United States. This past year, we welcomed 11 million fewer tourists than the year before. The U.S. was the world’s only major travel destination with a decline in international tourists. Take 15.5 million people on GLP-1 drugs and remove an additional 11 million tourists looking for a good time from the wine drinking equation, and you’ve got a good start for a downturn in consumption.
This detective thinks this focus on personal health is unhealthy. I work in my garden to grow my own organic vegetables, so much of what I eat is healthy I stretch my muscles when I reach for a bottle of wine on the top shelf of my wine cellar or when I crouch down to select bottles from cases on the ground. I get enough exercise walking to my local wine shop to buy wine.
After years of experience, I am convinced that drinking wine relieves stress, that having a satisfying meal with friends contributes to our well-being, and that spending time with friends is essential for living a rewarding life. I’m glad people want to be healthy, but we must bring moderation to bear on this emphasis on personal health. The true benefit of being healthy is to enjoy life. Wine helps us enjoy life. Life goes on. Pull a cork today, it’s the best you can do for yourself.
